I am one of those parents who say Because I said so, I say it a lot. I say it more than I thought I ever would which is a lot because when I was young I promised myself that I would never be one of those mothers who said it.
Of course I was stupid and childless at the time.
I say Because I said so not because I am power hungry and want to exert my authority, I say it because words fail me when I have to repeat the same reason over and over. I can’t usually articulate myself in the moment but I have a few minutes here so here are the reasons why I say Because I said so.
Because I don’t feel like cleaning up paints and clay at 9:30pm.
Because the recycling man comes at 7:30am, and I’d rather do my nagging on Thursday night than Friday morning.
Because, God Dammit, Christmas doesn’t officially start until after Thanksgiving!
Because I spent the whole fucking weekend putting the house back together and you did that in less than five minutes.
Because the cat really doesn’t enjoy being carried all day long.
Because techno dance music does not lull me to sleep.
Because the dog is hungry and he’s bugging me, and because he’s your dog.
Because we cannot live on a diet of Oreos and cheese popcorn.
Because I just spent a fortune straightening those teeth.
Because you smell.
Because I said so!
Don’t even get me started. For some reason I’ve been on a rampage because my kids just have to question every damn thing I say. Especially those two smelly pre teen and teen boys. You take a shower for 30 minutes and don’t wash your hair? and then I have to send you back in there to brush your teeth and put your deodorant on??!! Really? Remember when you got that dog for your birthday and promised me I’d NEVER EVER have to ask you to take him out? And oh ya, that black orange rind I found under your bed when I was hunting down the source of our newest fruit fly room mates – that’s why you do what I say. Shoot I don’t even say that anymore. I just growl at them and threaten to take away their video games. There are certain phrases I can’t say because I sound exactly like my mom –
I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to get you started. I agree with everything you ranted about here. I also refer you to Mike’s comment above.
I vowed I’d not use that term either, but I used it too. You just have to. I think it’s mandatory.
Have a terrific day and a very happy Thanksgiving. 🙂
Someone really needs to update the manual.
That’s why I always stop at “because.”
Simple. To the point. Extremely vague.
And because you forgot what you were going to say?
I suspect that all moms have earned the right to say that.
Me, all I can say is Maaaaa
I also growl at my kids. It sounds like Marge Simpson.
I tend not to invoke the “because I said so”. If they are talking to much in the car and I’ve told them to stop and they don’t, I invoke the cone of silence. If they don’t do their chores after repeated cajoling, I simply state the consequences or say “because I’m in charge and you’re not, so deal”. Yup, I use that one quite a bit, because they apparently are clueless as to his is in charge.
Semantics. Nothing more than semantics.
I’m glad I’ve only had to train horses and dogs.
They are so much easier to train. You wouldn’t think so but they are.
When we first had kids, I swore I would never say “because I said so.”
Somewhere in the history of maternity, I lost ground.
I lost the battle in February of 1993.
I was totally with you until the Oreos and cheese popcorn part. 🙂
Oreos, cheese popcorn and a six-pack of Coca Cola is all you need for living.
I’m feeling a little sick now, thanks.
I thought you might like that.
I suspect that phrase is standard issue to all parents, but I can’t remember if my Mom ever pull that one out. I usually did what I was told the first time, or at least the second. 😉
I did what I was told too, sure.
“Because, God Dammit, Christmas doesn’t officially start until after Thanksgiving!”
We are one, sis.
Which reminds me, can I borrow your little black dress for the office party?
Oh yes… I HATE when lights and blow up lawn ornaments go up a week before Thanksgiving!!! And those people take all their junk down the day AFTER Christmas. Can’t they just start a little later and enjoy it a little longer? It’s called the Epiphany, folks!
Mine comes down on New Years, or the next day depending on if I went out or not. For the last few years everything has come down on New Years.
Of course you can, I don’t know if you have the right sized ass for it however.
Oh, and kids suck.
Some days they really do.
Oh Goddess. I know people that have their Christmas tree up before Halloween! Blasphemy!
I see nothing wrong with “Because I said so.” Its a perfectly legitimate reason. 😀 I don’t have kids, but I want to tell some of the people that come into my store the next to last one you wrote.
NFW! You do not know people who have their tree up before Halloween, those people need to be taken out back and shot. That’s just so wrong.
Oh yes, I abuse the term “Because I said so” OFTEN. It’s highly effective.
It is effective but I hate sounding like my mother.
I hear that!
That is all.
Ha right back at you!
You can’t live off of oreos and cheese popcorn?
Apparently you can, just ask Nicky, Mike, and Dana.
Jenn, I am doing my rounds to thank all the best bloggers and friends a very Happy Turkey Day. I am sure tomorrow will bring a bunch of great stories you will be able to share with all of us and of course put smiles on all our faces. I am so thankful to be able to call you friend. Gobble, Gobble!!! Because I said so 🙂
Thanks MOB, I hope you had a great Turkey Day too.
Because if you get in an accident, you will want to have clean underwear on!!! (HINT: If indeed I am in an accident, my bet is my underwear WILL be soiled)
I also swore I’d never say that phrase but it just seems to come flying out of my mouth. That and surprisingly…’So if they all jumped off a bridge, would you do it too?’ made an appearance the other day.
Don’t even want to think of what else could possibly make a comeback.
Hope you enjoy Thanksgiving without too many Becauses Jen (-:
I say the bridge one all the time too. I also say “Just wait til you have kids of your own” a lot. They both tell me they are not going to have kids and I have to tell you that just pisses me off. Not because I want to be a grandma but because I believe in justice.
There’s not a damn thing wrong with Oreos and cheese popcorn! Unless you’re on your way to the dentist.
My son is convinced if you eat them together they taste like pancakes. I tried it and they do but without the syrup. So, if you ever have a hankering for pancakes but don’t want to make a mess just have Oreos and cheese popcorn.
Those are not words I have ever spoken 😉
You are a lucky woman.
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I don’t have kids, but I want kids, only so I can use these responses:
-Because I’m drunk.
-Because I make more money than you.
-Because you don’t have a job.
-Because you are bugging the crap out of me.
Great post I must say.. Simple but yet entertaining and engaging.. Keep up the awesome work!