Where nothing seems to be going right?

I’ve been having a string of them. I suspect it has something to do with the recent full moon but it could also be that things are just out of control right now.

As most of you know I’m a single mom. You may also recall that the boy left for college this fall so that leaves just me and the 8 year old. All things considered things are going pretty well. The daughter and I are very much alike and so we have found an easy rhythm to our routine.

The daughter makes the mess and I clean it up.

No, I’m joking. However there are certain things she can’t do due to her lack of height and inability to use power tools just yet. When the boy moved out I lost my grass cutter, snow blower/shoveler, recycler taker outer and sometimes trash hauler. The daughter can rake leaves but after a few minutes boredom sets in and the whining starts. I like to rake in peace. Whining just takes away from the monotony of raking.

As I’ve grown older I’ve come to enjoy monotony.

So where was I? A few weeks ago I threw out my back, something I have done numerous times before but usually within a day or two things are back to normal. Not this time. The pain didn’t get better and I decided I didn’t like being in pain and that it was time to actually take myself to a doctor to get it fixed. I didn’t want drugs, if possible, but I wanted relief so I was willing to do just about anything.

I’ve been in physical therapy twice a week for the last month and it has been wonderful (in fact it is so awesome it will be an entirely separate post). The problem is the place I go for the PT is a good half hour from home so I spend a lot of time driving in the middle of the day. If you drive in the middle of the day you know all about the old people on the road. If you don’t drive during the middle of the day, don’t start.

Anyway, because of all this driving around and doctors appointments I have to work later to get everything done. For the last month I have been getting further and further behind and so when I see the kitchen garbage is full and needs to be taken outside I get a little irritated because I can’t ignore it and hope someone else will take care of it. There is no one else, and there hasn’t for a long time but lately it seems as if I really want to leave it for someone else to take care of it.

Where’s the Laundry Fairy when you need her?

I was horribly upset to learn last week that the laundry fairy hadn’t come to the house even though I had thoughtfully left the clean clothes in the washing machine overnight. Isn’t that her job, to fill all the dryers out there with the wet, forgotten clothing of harried women everywhere? If the laundry fairy had come, like she was supposed to, I might not have had to wear sweat pants to my daughter’s doctor’s appointment.

Wearing sweats isn’t the end of the world but it does get old. However, it came in handy that I was wearing sweats when I picked my dog up from the groomers. Apparently, they clipped his nail too short and cut the quick. They had stopped the bleeding before I picked him up and didn’t bother telling me about it. If they had I might have been able to throw a sheet or old towel on the back seat of the car to prevent the crime scene that I was left with when I let him out of the car.

There was blood everywhere.

It looks as if there was a massacre in the back seat of my car. I don’t know how he got so much blood all over the place, it’s not like he enjoys car rides, all he does is sit there for the two mile ride, he still managed to get blood on the seat, the console and the window. Once we got him out of the car it stopped bleeding.

I spent the evening trying to get the blood stains out and thanks to Facebook I had plenty of different solutions to try. I used Dawn dishwashing liquid because that’s what I had on hand and wasn’t going to go to Walgreen’s to get hydrogen peroxide or shaving cream (really Meleah?). I think it worked pretty well but I have decided that the next car I get will have leather seats.

We watched Cujo the next day and could totally relate to the way the Pinto looked after that.

If that wasn’t enough I sliced the top of my finger off while cutting veggies for a salad while talking on the phone. Unfortunately my daughter was home from school because she was sick and so I couldn’t yell and swear that I had just sliced off the top of MY FUCKING FINGER because if I had she would have flipped out thinking I was going to die. Luckily the knife was so sharp it didn’t hurt that much but I took off a good portion of my finger nail with it so was forced to wear about three band aids (Halloween) on the tip of my finger because I was too afraid to use Crazy Glue on my open wound.

This was the second finger injury this week and already I was sporting Sponge Bob band aids on my other hand (I got a cardboard cut from carrying a box). Because of all the band aids I was unable to type without many mistakes for days.

The laundry fairy still hasn’t shown up. I’ve no idea where she is or why she isn’t showing up to my house but if you see her could you please send her my way?

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