I just opened a container of guacamole, Yucatan Guacamole to be exact. With a name like Yucatan I expect it to be made south of the border. Possibly near the Yucatan Peninsula.
On the inside of the lid is a little explanation of the guacamole dip. A couple sentences about the finest ingredients and all that. Underneath that is presumably the same few sentences in Spanish. The guac is good, if it wasn’t I wouldn’t have stood there reading the inside of the cap.
It’s been years since I have studied Spanish but I remember a fair amount of it. I can piece together a sentence or two if I have to. I certainly can at least recognize words. The first word of the little blurb in English was Because. In the Spanish translation it was Parce. This really threw me since I remember Because being Por que. As I tried to remember high school Spanish I read a little more of the Spanish translation and realized that it was not Spanish but French!
French? Why the hell would they translate the story of their guacamole into French. French people don’t eat guacamole. Maybe people who are descendants from the French do but people who speak French as their first language do not eat Guacamole. Now if this little half pint container held fish eggs, snails or lizard eyes I can see the logic of translating it to French. Heck it would be wise to have the whole thing written in French since no one who speaks English as a first language is going to touch that shit, but guacamole? It just doesn’t make any sense.
Upon further inspection I noticed that this particular guacamole is a product of Mexico but made in the US. It also happens to be Kosher and has Halal stamped on it but I am not sure what that means. The only thing missing from the label is an idication that it is vegetarian. Maybe they threw some lizard eyes in it for the French
Kosher foods are those that conform to the culture of Jewish religion. Things that aren’t kosher have ingredients derived from non-kosher animals or from kosher animals that were not properly slaughtered, a mixture of meat and milk. In fact Orthodox Jews have separate dinnerware for meat and milk. The slaughter of animals has to be supervised by a Rabbi and has to be done in a very specific manner. A food that is Halal is allowed by Islamic law.
How do I know all this? My ex-husband was Jewish. I never converted, but when I was attending college I did a term paper on Judaism for my Religion class.
Does guac even have any ingredients in it that require kosher vs non-kosher or halal?? I thought it was just avocado,a bit of lemon, and garlic, tomato…
That stuff is really good. I had some green salsa stuff, I’m assuming it was made with guacamole, when we were in Mexico this summer and I became addicted to it.
That stuff is vile – I try not to eat stuff that looks like snot on a cracker. Sorry, I think I’m crabby this morning…
As a connoisseur of guacamole, I can assure you that, if the French actually ate guacamole, it wouldn’t be that brand. It’s nasty.
Guacamole must be made fresh, or it’s not “kosher.”
Speaking of kosher, some people put bacon in guac. It’s weird, but if you’ve ever had a bacon, guac and cheese sandwich—yum!
Maybe they sell the stuff into Canada. Canada is an officially bilingual country and if you want to sell stuff here (I’m Canadian) the label has to be in both French and English.
Either that or the translator the company hired was a con artist who could only translate into French, but he told them it was Spanish.
On a (barely) related note: I was sitting in a doctor’s office waiting room the other day and two of the receptionists were having a conversation. One of them was learning Spanish and the other knew it already. So the learning one says, “I know the word for because. Porque!” And the other girl says, “It’s not PORK! It’s por que! It’s not what’s for dinner.” It made me laugh, especially considering how much I struggled in my Spanish classes.
Now all I can think of is how much I want some guac, with or without lizard eyes.
Rabbis get paid to declare something kosher so the faithful know they can eat it without recriminations – nice scam they have going there.
I thought the “Product of Absurdistan” meant that it was grown or manufactured in that country. I guess in this case, the avocados were grown in Mexico but mashed into guac in the States. How very international! The stuff packaged in the US by Big Corp will have French on the label so they can sell the same packaging in Canada where French is required on all products.
Small world.
Cheers
J’adore guacamole. Je suis un chevre qui parle un Francais, Espanol et Anglais…
at least until the publist had brain surgery and all the languages she knew fell out. She does not recommend brain surgery. But she does love guacamole especially when made fresh. Me, I don’t eat the stuff. Too mushy. Give me a crisp apple any day.
Guac in any language is awesome.
ewwwww lizard eyes, snails, etc. . . . Don’t you hate it when people bake a whole fish and leave the eyes in?
Girl, what were you doing spending that much brainpower on a food label? If it tastes good, just eat it and don’t ask questions. 😀
Lola, wow, your knowledge of all things never ceases to amaze me. I went to an all girls Catholic school for two years before they kicked me out. For some strange reason I told everyone I was Jewish. They believed me which probably made me think they were all idiots and thus led to my eventual dismissal.
Mary Moore, that was my thought exactly.
I hate, I think it’s better down there. Not only is it made fresh but it is made with all sorts of love. Or at least that is what Jose tells me when he makes it for me. He probably spits in it when I’m not looking.
Venom, we all have bad days. I hope you are feeling cheerier now. Even if it is snot on a cracker it is still good. Of course no one eats gauc on a cracker.
Mother, bacon, guac and cheese sounds delicious. I like any guac that doesn’t contain small chips of wood in it which is how I tend to make it. I’ll have to post that recipe some day.
Joel, I actually wrote about it being sold in Canada but I edited it out as it was far too offensive for my mild mannered blog. Sorry about that.
Shawn, See if it was French the porque would make sense especially if it contained pork.
Old Man, me too. I think the lizard eyes might even add a bit of texture that regular guac is missing.
David, You are absolutely right. I don’t know about the Kosher bit being a scam, no more than paying tithes at least. Well actually a lot less than paying tithes. Does anyone do that anymore?
Pricilla, Your French is very good. Of course I don’t speak French so I have no idea what you said but it looks good.
Seems to me you are a bit of a picky eater. You don’t like bark, or avacado. Your publicist needs to give you a variety of food or other goats might think you are snooty.
Gina, I don’t get the leaving of the fish eyes either but they do it with pigs too. There are so many foods that are a bit on the odd side but someone seems to like them.
Carole, I was eating the guac right out of the container standing at the kitchen counter so my kids didn’t see that I had opened the guac and thus I would have had to share it with them. I also like to read when I am hording food.
Is there any icon or mark to distinguish between kosher, non kosher and halal as the green makr and redmak differentiate the veg and non veg foods in India.
I have a container of that stuff in my freezer right now. It is good stuff!!!! I had to go get up and see about the French and OMG WTF?? French and not Spanish?? So shocked!!
Hey Jen,
Innocent question: Was my description of halal prep too much, or did I forget to fill out the captcha thing again? Just curious.
-Sean
Dr. Hamid, I’m not sure if that is a question or a statement.
Stephanie, See, I told ya! Hard to believe but there it is.
Sean, I don’t moderate my comments so you must have forgotten to do the captcha thingy. I don’t even know why I have that honestly I should get rid of it. I’d love to see your graphic comments.
i made guacamole last time…my in-laws love it…eventhough it’s my first time to make it…
hope you can visit me back
http://www.mymeryl.com
Thats what I figured. Lets see if I can get the flair of the original back.
Yadda yadda yadda, blah blah blah.
Damn, lost it!
Yucatan Guacamole Rocks~! Yum! Yum! Yum!…
french eat nachos too dumbass
You must be French.
3 Cheers for Yucatan Guacamole! Super Chunky and Yummy…..