As many of you know I am hosting a blog conference this summer (If you want to come and meet everyone too you can!). I am really excited about meeting everyone in real life, all these bloggers are people I feel a kinship with, they are like family and I can’t wait to see them face to face.
But then I stop and think about Kathy’s recent post about how her picture on her blog doesn’t exactly look like the real life Kathy anymore. Mine doesn’t either. It’s not that far off but blogging for the last four years has made my ass spread a little more than I would like to admit, even though I have blogged about, FB’d the details and tried all kinds of crazy ass diets before. Nothing has worked. But I refuse to give up because, dammit, I am going to look like my header if it kills me.
The worst part about me, aside from my not a size 4 ass, is that I sit all day and therefore I don’t use my abs. I’d love to have a set of abs like P!nk but that would mean I would have to do all kinds of crazy things like sit ups and stuff. I don’t want to do sit ups because you have to do them on the floor and I have pets and most recently had a bunny, I don’t want to sit on my floor let alone do a sit up on it.
I could join the gym like Kathy did but I work from home so that would mean I would have to actually make a point to leave the house to go and work out. Since I don’t have to go to work outside the house the likelihood of me going to the gym is pretty slim. I’ve thought about it, a lot. I’ve even gone to several local fitness centers and taken them up on their trial offers. I would have even joined if I wasn’t assaulted (approached for an upsell) every time I walked in the door to work out. Nope, I have to do this at home, on my own time and in my own way.
I know that sounds like Charlie Sheen talking but really, I can handle this, I don’t have a problem. I can work out any time I want.
Really.
No, instead (and because I have a few months) I am going to try some ab workouts the easy way. I’m going to do sit ups in my desk chair, maybe in bed, and possibly while standing up by simply flexing what is left of my abdominals after both pregnancies left them more like Kirstie than P!nk.
On second thought (because I have been Googling for images of abdominals and came up with all kinds of horrid pictures of flabby abs) I am going to take this seriously and get on my floor and start doing those sit ups. Seems to me there was a work out program designed for sit ups where you do one sit up each day and then add another sit up each day you do it, so on the first day you did one sit up, the next day 2 and so on until by the end of the month you are doing 30 sit ups. Seems to me you are supposed to do this for 100 days. I could do that. I could do one extra sit up each day. I think.
And I could tape that image of Mario onto my fridge and my bathroom mirror so that I was forced (yeah, like it would be hard to look at that several times a day) to look at each morning and whenever I want a snack. If that doesn’t prevent me from eating mindlessly and force me to do some work outs, I don’t know what will.
What works for you? Do you do sit ups? How many can you do? Do you do them on your floor or do you go to a gym and use a machine? Isn’t Mario Lopez hot?
Related articles
- Sit-ups myth! They won’t give you a 6-pack and could leave you a POT BELLY (dailymail.co.uk)
- The new diet rules (mirror.co.uk)
- Charlie Sheen: I’m Ready to Get Back to Work (cbsnews.com)
I’m just naturally amazing. I might write a how-to book about it. Hope it helps!
Doing crunches is on my list. But here’s the beauty. In order to get the maximum benefit from them, you shouldn’t do them every day–every other day is better.
Um, Mario’s got some hella abs up there. Now what was the article about?
Ass size… ahem… I’ve found success with the “poverty and stress” diet. Seriously, when you haven’t got it to spend, cookies, crackers, chips, breads, candy, sodas, ice cream and other assorted impulse snacks are the first to go. I dropped a size just by cutting out all that crap.
As for exercise, I’m pretty sedentary, too, but I do have a 1500-pound equine “Pilates” machine that has been known to give me some E-ticket rides so when I’m on him pretty much everything is clenched.
Good luck with those sit-ups.
Now those guys in this clip are in shape but they don’t have a flat stomach. But I guess women don’t play that sport. I wanted to change my look years ago so I grew a goatee and it was much easier than losing weight or getting trim. That would not be acceptable for you even if you could but there’s always haircuts and tattoos (I don’t even like tattoos but you are probably younger and more hip so maybe you would).
You know your chances of getting hit by the bus or train are the same if you work out or not.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pcAABExweJY
I’ve never done a sit-up in my life. I was always very active, and played sport right into my mid thirties. Unfortunately, since my fifties, I have very slowly (so slowly that I didn’t notice it) gained weight. Sitting at a computer all day is no way to stay trim! The only way I could lose my excess weight is on my Wii. I have no interest in workouts at all, and know I wouldn’t keep it up if I started.
Maybe we should call it ‘Blogger’s Bum’
My tummy looks a lot like Pink’s. Of course, she’s pregnant and I’m not.
To get in better shape, I watch a lot of exercise programs on tv. I don’t do the exercises of course, but I do watch them. But they all look pretty hard so I get bored after a while. Jogging is good, but a little hard in stilettos. How about swimming? Oh, wait, I can’t swim. Nor would I put on a bathing suit until I got in better shape. I’m not coming.
Damn that Mario Lopez! He photoshopped his head on a picture of my body again! He’ll be hearing from my lawyers!
Jen, you’re beautiful already! And when you tone those abs and shrink that butt a little, you’ll be even beautifuller! 😉
Exercise? Gym? Abs? What are those things? I’m actually building up body mass for when I retire and have no money to eat. Then I can spend years wasting away.
My Mommeh got an XBox last month just so she could do some of the Kinect workouts; she’s in the middle of doing The Biggest Loser workout. You can actually watch yourself (well the outline of yourself) exercising on the screen. That is pretty good motivation for my Mommeh.
What works for you?
That’s easy, putting on my Outfit and going Outside.
Do you do sit ups?
Yep.
How many can you do?
Around 100.
Do you do them on your floor or do you go to a gym and use a machine?
On my floor.
Isn’t Mario Lopez hot?
Um…I don’t think so!
OK, first of all, yes, Mario Lopez is hot.
I have decided to make everyone feel better at the conference and be the designated “fatty boom batty” and not lose the 35 pounds I’ve gained in the last few years. How’s that?
That is really sweet of you. Way to take one for the team. Of course I still
have to do what I have to do. But thanks anyway!
Oh hail no! Sit-ups are out, as are crunches. One word: PLANKS. It’s a pilates move that works your core much better and gives you better results, and you never have to sit on the floor. Check it out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6I990Wbr1JE&feature=related