It’s been two days without wine and chocolate and so far it’s not so bad.

That’s a lie. It is bad but not because I can’t have wine or chocolate but because I have learned that I use wine and/or chocolate like I did cigarettes. I can handle the stresses of the day because I know at the end of the day I’m going to have a glass of wine and a few pieces of chocolate and that makes getting through the stress possible. I don’t need to wine or chocolate during the stress but knowing they are going to happen makes the stress bearable.

It’s bad because I have to deal with the stress and because I’m not having the wine I’m actually not eating the extra calories so I am hungry. Not real hunger, mind you, but hunger that my body uses to get me to eat junk.

I’m tired and cold and I have a headache and I know if I were to eat something sweet (like chocolate) I’d get rid of all those side effects of not eating garbage. The ironic thing is that I don’t feel hungry in my stomach. It’s all emotional and psychological.