Today was my daughter’s birthday party. We had four little girls over for KFC and cake. We also had a pinata which no one but ex#2 could crack.

 

Daughter scored two Zhu Zhu pets, a wheel for them to run on, and a couple of Barbies. One of the Barbies was rather classy with designer shoes and a designer bag, she even had a Starbucks in her hand. The other Barbie had a dog and three puppies. One of the puppies pees when you feed it.

Does Mattel hate parents?

 

Of course they do. What other explanation is there for making a doll that has a pet that pees. I have enough trouble keeping the real dog we have from peeing on the carpet, I don’t need a pretend one to do the same.

 

It is also abundantly clear that Mattel hates parents based on the way they package their Barbies (and all other toys). Is it necessary to tie these dolls down with plastic staples, rubber bands, thread and tape? Do they think the doll is going to escape? It certainly isn’t for security purposes because just opening the box takes a steak knife and a crowbar. I spend so much more time trying to get the damn doll out of the box with hair and arms still attached, than my daughter will ever spend playing with it.

 

I had Barbies when I was a kid, I loved Barbies. I played with them until I was way past a reasonable doll playing age. Probably because all I had to do was open the box and take the doll out. Homeland security could learn a thing or two from the Mattel packaging department.

 

Zhu Zhu pets. These things rock! No, really, they do. I never post on Saturdays. Daughter was rightfully excited when she unwrapped them. She hasn’t been able to play with them since she unwrapped them because I have been hogging them. These things are hilarious. They say all kinds of cute little hamster words and they run all over the place. They talk to each other and run in packs if you have more than one. I could play with these things for hours. Even better they don’t poop or pee like real hamsters. Best yet, they completely fuck the cat up. She doesn’t know what to make of them. She knows they aren’t real but she can’t resist them either. Even better than all that, all you have to do is open the box to get them out. They even come with batteries.

 

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