The anticipation is killing me. I’m not even sure that’s the right word, but I simply can’t wait much longer to find out who will win this election. Sure, I’m almost 100% certain it will be Hillary Clinton, but by the way the internet is acting (and her surrogates and the media are overreacting) one might get the impression the race is a lot closer than it really is.

Each day there’s something different – Hillary is sick, Trump says something horribly offensive to everyone. The email scandal becomes the news, for a few days at least, with each email dump from Wikileaks, Trump’s old tax returns are dug up. Pay to play, Trump Foundation, Parkinson’s, small hands, immunity, bankruptcy, Benghazi, Russia… the lists go on and on (you can see both of their scandal sheets here and here.

The thing is, nothing ever sticks to either one of them, they never have to explain anything, we all just forget about the last scandal as soon as the next one becomes breaking news. Both of them are deplorable.

The Anticipation is Killing Me!

I notice that one of them pulls ahead in the polls after a debate or news dump and I think to myself “great, there’s no way they can win the election after this”. I’m happy for a few minutes and then I realize that means the other one will win, and then I’m nervous again.

This election, especially the last few months of it, has been just like waiting for find out who Negan killed in the last episode of season 6 on The Walking Dead.

I’ve spent months trying to discern who it is that met his or her bloody death at the end of Lucille*. I’ve read numerous blogs, watched the show over and over, and I’ve even started hanging out in forums to see if I can’t read the room. Certainly there must be some indication somewhere of what’s to come?

Except there probably isn’t. The writers fucked with us all season 6, even faked Glenn’s death once, presumably so they could kill him again at the end of the season**. For all we know, they haven’t even shot the scene where the victim is revealed yet.

And just like the election, it doesn’t matter who. Whoever it is, it’s going to suck.

*Lucille is a baseball bat used by Negan, the baddest of bad guys in The Walking Dead, who wrapped it in barbed wire and likes to bash people to pulp with it to prove who’s in charge.

**I’m not really sure why I thought that one needed a footnote, anyway, I’ve forgotten it now.