National Vagina Day

January 29, 2009

Today must be National Vagina Day and I managed to miss it on my calendar. Crotchety Old Man and Ettarose both wrote about Oprah’s va jay jay today. From there I spotted this link on Unfinished Rambler‘s site. Coincidence? I think not.

I wish I had known it was National Vagina Day. If I had, I would have worn some really frilly underpants and maybe even gotten a wax. I would have posted pictures of Georgia O’Keeffe paintings on my blog and maybe featured ads from Summer’s Eve.

I don’t mind celebrating National Vagina Day, let’s face it most of us either have one or like to play with one (or more for some of you people out there). I’m not so sure that Oprah’s should be the one we all think of when we celebrate National Vagina Day. I’m sure hers is nice, she can get all kinds of nifty waxes, or she could do corn rows to highlight her va jay jay but really do we want her vagina representing all of us on this great national holiday? I think not. I think we should have a vagina that better represents the common man, err woman. Not one that is worth a few gazillion.

No, the vagina that we should all look up to in these uncertain economic times should be more in tune to the common man’s, err woman’s, day to day struggles. A woman who has tried the full on shave and realized that it just isn’t worth the three days of trying discreetly to scratch the hell out of her crotch during board meetings and PTA conferences. This rules out both Madonna and Michael Jackson. The current crop of celebutards are also ruled out since this is National Vagina Day and not National Bread Baking Day.

The vagina we should all look to up should be strong, odor free and meticulous about who enters. Therefore I nominate Janet Reno’s Vagina for this glorious holiday.

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