Last year around Thanksgiving I was approached by an awesome Minnesota PR firm with an idea for my blog. They wondered if I was interested in getting my legs waxed at the newly opened European Wax Centers at Calhoun Village in Minneapolis. Since I had never had my legs waxed before I was all excited about the idea of someone smearing hot wax on my legs and then ripping it off with utter abandon.
Sure, sign me up.
After a few emails with the awesome PR firm I learned that I would need to grow my body hair for several weeks so it was long enough to get ripped out. This was important because if your hair is too short the wax doesn’t adhere as well as it should and only pulls it out part way causing great pain and not actually making you hairless.
Winter was coming so shaving was optional, though something I have never done before. I am a shave my legs on Monday, Wednesday and Friday kind of girl, it goes with conditioning my hair. Giving up shaving was not going to be easy, especially those first few days when it gets all stubbly and pokey. But I persevered and resisted the temptation to shave my legs while conditioning. Not shaving my legs disrupted my whole shower schedule however. Suddenly I had a few more minutes on my hands three days a week. Sadly I did absolutely nothing productive with those extra minutes.
It was an easy enough assignment – not to shave, but I blew it. This was around the holidays and there were parties to go to and skirts to wear. I just could not wear pantyhose and have the hairs on my legs stick through. I did let me arm pit hair grow, that was easy to skip and I don’t do sleeveless so not a problem.
My appointment was fast approaching and I had shaved. I wasn’t convinced they would notice since I come from an extremely hairy family where certain members have to or should shave their necks and backs. I figured it would never be noticed.
So the day of my appointment arrives and I head on over to Minneapolis. I’m from St. Paul, we don’t do Minneapolis unless we have to. And we do have to because all the good stuff is in Minneapolis (because we are Minnesotans we are used to denying ourselves the good stuff but sometimes you have to go there and when that happens a GPS comes in handy). Thankfully I knew the area I was going to and didn’t get too lost.
I walk into the salon, a very clean and good smelling place, and am greeted by several women who are dressed in black. Dressed nicely in black, unlike myself who is wearing black but in sweat pants form. I immediately feel as if I should have stayed in St. Paul where sweat pants are not accepted either but where we have more halfway houses so I fit in better. I am given a run down on what to expect and then introduced to my waxing technician, Urzula.
Urzula directs me to our room and asks me to take off my pants and get up on the table. She turns around and fiddles with the thermostat while I disrobe. She explains to me that European Wax Centers does not recycle the wax nor do they double dip. Since I have never had a wax before this doesn’t mean a whole lot to me until I see all the little hairs that are attached to the ripped off wax and then I am thankful they don’t recycle. As I am disrobing I am frantically searching for the paper gown to put on because I suddenly feel as if I am at the gynecologists office. There is no paper gown and it is really cold in the room.
Urzula explains to me that she has turned up the heat and it should be warmer in a few minutes. Meanwhile I lie on the table in my underpants with no paper gown.
The lack of sufficient heat worries me because when it is cold my legs get all goose bumpy and the hairs on my legs are harder to get to. I laugh and make a few jokes but the goose bump, cheating on the don’t shave rule and my exposure really has me concerned. Did I mention I am from St. Paul? We don’t get naked for anyone, not even the gynecologist. Hell, we have sex with our clothes on.
Urzula runs her hands up my legs (not in a creepy way) and says that my hair is too short.
She says she will try to wax my legs but cautions me that it will hurt more because there is little for the wax to grab onto.
And she is right, it does hurt. We give up on the legs because I am scaring other clients and move to my underarm hair which is nice and long.
She smears on the wax, gives it a second to cool down, and then rips it off in one mighty pull.
No shit, there was no pain when she ripped that baby off. Suddenly I was liking this waxing thing a whole lot.
After putting on my pants I make another appointment in four more weeks so my hair is sufficiently long. I apologize for not having rock star hair and head on back home.
Flash forward four weeks and I look like Bigfoot or some granola hippy chick from Macalester College. I have no desire to shave anymore because it seems so silly. In fact, since I have so much hair on my legs I find myself recycling more and watching Rachel Maddow on MSNBC. I even think about getting a Prius.
My second appointment arrives and I am not so keen on getting naked again. I really would like to have a paper gown but I don’t want to be a baby about it so I say nothing – for about five minutes and then I cave and ask for anything to cover my fat thighs. Afton, my new waxing technician, says there is nothing she hasn’t seen before and I have no reason to be bashful. That’s easy for Afton to say because she is beautiful and doesn’t have cellulite hanging off the table.
She rips a piece of the table paper off and gives it to me to cover up. I feel stupid but much better about the whole thing.
Afton praises my hairy legs.
And then she starts smearing wax all over my legs, feet and toes and starts ripping it off. While it doesn’t hurt as much as it did when my hair was too short it is still not pain free. As she moves up my leg the pain gets more intense because I have no muscle tone and said cellulite which makes the skin less taught than down at my ankles.
Between my screams Afton asks if I would like a bikini wax while we are at it.
I laugh because I assume she is kidding, when I realize she is not I mention something about it being winter and I need as much warmth as possible since I am trying to lower my heating bills.
I then ask her if she has a blog because I am now one of those people I blog about.
Instead she does an eyebrow wax for me, something that doesn’t hurt at all.
I realize I love Afton because she doesn’t make fun of my Andy Rooney eyebrows and even suggests I use Shape It to keep my eyebrows in place. Sold! No more Andy Rooney for me.
Through out the whole process Afton is explaining to me the waxing process and how it exfoliates and makes my skin softer. She tells me that it takes about three waxings to get baby ass smooth skin and then after that a wax every 6-8 weeks will keep it that way. She also says that the hair grows back less thick and less coarse so you can’t see it during those 6-8 weeks.
Which means I have to go back and finish the process before I can show you pictures of smooth legs. However, I no longer want to watch Rachel Maddow or buy a prius which means my legs are actually pretty smooth.
Because I am an awesome blogger European Wax Centers have given me a gift set of body wash, lotion and serum that prevents ingrown hair to give away to one of my amazing readers. However, because I came home with newly waxed legs and there is no humidity in my house during the winter, and because I am a redhead and I bruise easily and my hair follicles stick up so severely, I ripped into the gift set and smothered my legs with all the product at once. I gotta tell you this stuff smells wonderful and it really calms your skin. So I don’t have that gift set anymore but I will get another one for whomever is chosen.
So here are the rules for the three piece skin care gift set from European Wax Centers:
You only need to leave one comment but you must follow me on Facebook, share this on Facebook and leave a comment telling me your best body hair story. It can be about waxing, shaving, epiladying, or anything else about hair. I will announce the winner next Monday.
European Wax Centers were also kind enough to give me certificates for a free wax to any of my readers who want one. European Wax Centers have 179 salons around the country so there is sure to be one near you. If you want a free wax just let me know in the comment section and I will send one to you.